The Responsible And Reliable Helpmeet

In continuation of our Helpmeet series, our post today centers on The Responsible and Reliable Helpmeet. If you are new on the site, check out The Diary of a Helpmeet and The Physically Attractive Helpmeet to understand where we are coming from.

To be a responsible helpmeet means to have an obligation to do something positive and helpful for your husband. It also means you have a partnership role to take care of him.

Genesis 2:18 KJV says “And the Lord God said, it is not good that the man should be alone, let me make him a helpmeet.”

The intention of God when He made a wife in Eve for Adam and also made this declaration was Partnership and Companionship. Therefore, you have a responsibility to be a reliable helpmeet to your husband. You have to be consistently gaining his trust and be good to him. You are a responsible and reliable helpmeet when your husband conveniently leaves crucial matters in your care.

 

How can you be a better responsible and reliable helpmeet to your husband?

The following points will answer this question:

 

• Be A Harbor Of Rest

Being a harbor of rest simply means you offer your shoulder to your husband to rest on especially when he is overwhelmed due to the pressures of life. This also connote that you stand with him even if the world is behind him. Let your husband be able to confide in you without restraints. The time your husband comes back from work is not the time to complain or nag rather do things that make him happy. Prepare his favorite meal if it’s available.

 

• Be Supportive

Your husband, shouldered with the responsibility of providing for and protecting the family as the head may feel tired at a point or the other. As a responsible and reliable helpmeet, you should be able to cater for everyone in the family by managing the resources in the house.

 

• Be Financially Intelligent

To be a responsible and reliable helpmeet, you must gain financial intelligence. You as a wife will not be the one to increase the household expenditures on frivolities rather think of ways to increase the income. Not only will you increase the income in the family but you also protect what your husband work hard for.  Find something you are good at and turn it into a profit making venture. Don’t make unwise financial decisions. Don’t make emotional or sentimental purchase. Ask yourself honest questions before you spend, questions like:

What purpose will what I intend to buy serve?

Is this expenditure really needed now?

Will it in anyway increase or reduce our monthly budget?

Your sincere answers from these questions will guide you in your spending. Responsible helpmeets are marriage builders not destroyers. Don’t be caught in the web of making a shipwreck of your union because of reckless financial habits.

 

• Be A Listener

Nagging is the last thing a man want to come back home to. Don’t be a wife that does not allow her husband land with his statement before picking it up. Listen more than you speak. If there is an issue that needs to be resolved, ask to know his own side before bashing him with harsh words, that’s really dangerous to a man. It’s understandable that some things might be hurting that you can’t wait to unleash your anger but you really need to be patient as a responsible and reliable helpmeet.

 

• Be A Complimentary Wife

Compliments mean a lot to men and so you should not be stingy with it in your marriage relationship. You should not be filled with criticizing statements every time. I know there are times that you advise him but he refuses to follow it, allow him breathe if he fails to follow your seemingly good advice. Hopefully, a next time will come and he would have learnt to value your counsels. Compliment him even in his failures and assure him that it is fine to make mistakes and that you are his greatest cheer leader.

 

• Be Diligent

The Bible in Proverbs 22:29 KJV says “Seest thou a man (woman) diligent in his (her) business? He (she) shall stand before kings; he (she) shall not stand before mean men.”

An industrious woman is a blessing and joy to her family. Taking a cue from the virtuous woman in Proverbs 31:10-31, she was a diligent woman. That was why she could achieve so much in her family.

Procrastination is a thief of time, but you fight it when you are diligent. You can plan your day with some online applications that can be installed to help ease your day.

 

• Pay Attention To Yourself

Pay attention to yourself by taking care of yourself. Don’t work so much that you forget yourself. You matter in the scheme of things too. At the end of the day, your husband will not like you looking older than him. Be an extraordinary helpmeet by taking care of yourself physically, spiritually and mentally.

Leave your husband no option but to always come back home to a responsible, reliable and sweet helpmeet.

 

May God make us responsible and reliable helpmeets to our husbands in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

 

Questions and Answers

Question: How do I avoid a ‘boring end of discussion’? What I mean is that, the very moment he’s downloading what he wants to say, I do have a lot I want to reply to keep the conversation going but if I have to keep quiet I would forget the suggestions or points I would have said to him.

Answer

Well, it still doesn’t change the fact that we must have listening ears. In fact, not just for our husbands, even for our children. As humans, it’s just one of those things we don’t have the natural patience for but we have to learn it. With time, you’ll master remembering your points.

I just know it doesn’t send a good signal when he’s talking and you’re dragging to say your own. That’s not even an effective communication. If possible, jot down your points and pick them one by one.

For example, my hubby writes down points when he wants to have real discussion with me. And truly sometimes, I really want to cut in especially if he’s misunderstanding something I did but he reminds me to let him be through. And once he’s done, I speak uninterrupted too. This is the way we both can understand our points. If not, we’ll keep dragging.

So, I’ll advice you jot down your points and if it seems impossible, then you make do with points that you can remember and leave the rest for God.

Another thing is telling your husband to let you guys talk about issues one after the other. That way, you get to drop your points before another talk steals it.

 

Discussion corner

Contribution

While discussing you can note down some of your points in a jotter in short forms so that it won’t be as if you aren’t paying attention to him when he’s speaking.

For example, if you have it in mind to say ‘I want us to start praying everyday in the evening so that our prayer altar can be strengthened’, then you can just write down ‘prayers’ or ‘family prayers’.

That way, it won’t take you too long to note down what you intend to say and just a quick perusal will help you to remember faster when you are ready to speak.

 

Experience

We must learn not to interrupt whatever they are going to say, so as not to jump into hasty conclusions, for both our kids and husbands. It pisses the person speaking to you off and might lead to an avoidable argument. Let the person land before saying your mind.

I am talking from experience. Everyone, men especially hates it when interrupted while speaking; it is not nice to them at all. We women might cope with talking and interrupting ourselves because everyone wants to talk at the same time but most men love to be listened to with little or no interruptions.

 

 

Topic: The Responsible and Reliable Helpmeet

 

Lecturer: Joy Maradesa

 

Date Delivered: Wednesday 18^th August, 2021